Insight to myself

I started crossdressing in my teens when I started high ******.I remember reading the news of the world newspaper at the time and seen an advertisement for a crossdressing service which got me curious especially looking at before and after pic.I got in from ****** day after and parents were working so I took a trip to my mums wardrobe and it began from there.I slipped on a dress with tights and pair of her heels and it felt so right.Especially wearing the tights with heels which I must say is no better feeling.From there onwards whenever I got chance I would dress and make sure everything was put back perfectly.Was nearly caught once when mum got away from work early and had to jump in toilet to get changed,thankfully she never came upstairs.Thats when she noticed her stockings were touched and luckily she thinks my aunt was snooping till this day.This gave me big fright and put me off for a bit but u all know what its like,the urge gets too strong and was back at it again.I then had few girlfriends and tried to get over which I believed was a phase I was going through but it ended up being more to me.Whenever I was out I couldn't help look at other women thinking I would love to wear what they were wearing,especially heels as I have a secret passion for them.I tried on some girlfriends outfits,usually the clothes they had to wash so they wouldn't be suspicious .I got my own flat with mate who worked backshift so thought would give me time to dress but he let me down and needed financial back up so uncle moved in and never had time to dress.Started to drink a lot as got bad injury and couldn't play football then met my wife.We got own place then had kids and it all began again.I took a heart turn and was housebound for a year.so when had home to my own the urge returned and I would dress again.Started dabbling with makeup aswell but not good with it at moment hence why I have no face pic which I hope to change soon.This site has been great as spoke to many people who have been in same circumstances and made many new friends.Next big steps for myself is to try get out as Gemma and full makeover which pics will hopefully follow.Thanks if you took time to read this and hopefully you enjoyed it.If you ever fancy a chat don't hesitate to message myself. Gemma xxxx