Another Thought For Today

Confidence is a wonderful thing, it allows us to do things that otherwise our paranoia would be telling us is not possible to do. Many of the girls on here, and other places, will probably say they originally lacked the confidence to go out in public, fearful of the negative reactions, be it verbal or physical abuse. They never expected positive reactions because that just did not happen. Their paranoia told them that. But given time, they overcome their paranoia and gain confidence.

So what gives them confidence? Sometimes it is someone else's positive experience showing that other people's reactions are rarely negative, often positive but mostly other people do not notice or do not worry about it. The art of blending in gained from experience. Even so, going out alone is still a scary situation. Many do it at night, on their own, so as not to be seen, but is that really the safest way to go out?

So what about going out with a friend? But who? Many friends may not understand or even accept someone who is transgender or a crossdresser. However the community that has developed recently means that through various sites and forums, it is easy to correspond with others in the same situation and find someone to help with going out.

Some will have male friends, who they either know before coming out about being TG, or they may have met subsequently. In this context, I mean friends as just that...friends! These male friends will also lack confidence to go out with anyone who is TG/CD because of the possible negative reactions. But they are willing to help and for any girl, going out with a trusted male friends does have the advantage that other are less likely to "have a go".

But is some respects, it is easier, in my opinion, to knock, shatter and completely destroy the confidence the male friend may have had. I am not saying this is common, but I can only speak from my own experience. I have tried, and hopefully succeeded, in helping some friends go out for the first time by being with them, holding their hand either imagined or real.

Doing so the first time is difficult although maybe not as difficult as dealing with the kick in the teeth that comes later, when they have their confidence and no longer need their friend to hold their hand. We have becomes a means to an end for them, and for me, the experience makes me wonder "why do I bother?"