"I am sorry for your loss"

"I am sorry for your loss". A cold impersonal statement, usually said to someone who has recently lost a close friend or relative, by a nameless official who is more interested in the business of registering the death or closing the bank account of the deceased, than the emotional situation the person is going through. Maybe it's because they deal with it on a daily basis that it has become part of their "business image speak" that they say it without even realising how it sounds. We all accept that when having to clear up the affairs of someone who has passed away.

But when it comes on a personal level, by someone we know, it not only sounds cold and impersonal, but but even insulting. Maybe it is just how I see things now. Finding out that I seem to no longer matter to someone I once thought of as a friend, followed by hearing that a friend of +40 years has passed away, perhaps I am doing an injustice to another, who offered those words with genuine feelings.

Emotions are a strange phonima that despite what many will tell you, no one really understands. They are probably one of the few situations where the build up of problems causes an overall situation which is significantly greater than the sum of its parts.