Being a Crossdressing Man

Being a Cross-dressing Man

HiYa Girls. I
have some further thoughts on the wonderful life of the crossdressing
man who just loves to don women's clothing. Once it gets a-hold of us
it doesn't let go does it? On this trip I want to discuss a fairly
delicate topic not often touched on in these pages. I was reading an
old Tri-Ess “Femme Mirror” quarterly news magazine from the 1990s
and I stumbled upon an article by an individual who was a
crossdresser but directed his/her comments at men in general. And it
made me think hard about myself as a crossdressing man and how I
behave as a man among men otherwise.

First of all, I
am somewhere midpoint on that feminine continuum where I love to
dress up and I love to go out in public like that but (a big but) I
am not and never will fly down range and become transgendered. When
dressed as a CD girl I do try somewhat to make my behaviour a little
softer and I try to imitate the softer walk that women have but you
know, it goes with the clothes. Guy clothes. Guy behaviour.

The article in
question somewhat annoyed me in that it was so typical of the modern
attitude much of society has when considering cis-men (genetic guys).
It is no secret that men tend to be frowned upon these days as being
overly aggressive, overly ambitious, overly competitive and perhaps
overly rambunctious. There I've said it. The referenced article was
critical of men for all these characteristics and more. Mens'
behaviour can be found on a continuum also; from mild to wild, for
sure. The article suggested that mens' out of control behaviour was
responsible for all the wars and violence through human history. (I
would have loved to argue WW2 with him/her.) The article tended to
blame men for pretty much all the world's ills and then some without
giving any credit for all of the wonderful things men have been
responsible for through the ages.

Of course,
we've heard these words in other places. I prefer to think of cis-men
as having the characteristics of the quintessential English
gentleman. Polite, not quite to a fault. Thoughtful. Gregarious.
Honest and trustworthy. Loving to his family. Patriotic to his
country. Calm, cool and collected under stress. Alternatively,
strong, clear-eyed, and aggressive when he needs to be. This is a
gentleman I would want as my friend. I think most of us would. In my
own life I try to be this type of man most of the time. And, yes, I'm
not always successful.

On to how men
treat women. Hitler's axiom was women were to be totally devoted to
“Children, Kitchen and Church” and maximize production of
children for the good of the state. Nobody in their right mind would
limit women to that today. Nobody. However, nobody should criticize a
woman if hearth and home complete with children are what she desires

Do men these days treat women poorly? Some do and that has always
been the way. Our society/culture is still developing and still has a
hard time excising some behaviours. Although I can tell you that
after reading a history of how women were treated prior to the last
century things are a lot better today.

Prior to the
20th century women were treated harshly, as second class
citizens who were controlled rigidly by men. Yes this is true but it
is not typical of modern Western societies anymore. Just like for
crossdressers, cis-women are treated with much more respect than in
days of yore. We should be thankful for that. Some of my fellow
crossdressers have told me they are always treated better in public
when they present as women. Nothing wrong with that.

Going back to
that article, I do not think it is of much use to criticize men in
general for being more competitive, or more assertive than most/many
women are. Studies show that as hard as some people might try to
convince us otherwise, boys from an early age exhibit certain traits
typical of men and most girls from an early age exhibit the traits
typical of women. Nature or Nurture? Of course, your mileage may
vary.

Further, I
would say that women who exhibit strongly aggressive or competitive
traits may not be appealing to some or perhaps many men but if that
is who they are they need to be true to themselves. However, I doubt
that many crossdressers want to have the persona of an aggressive,
highly competitive woman. I certainly do not. You can call me “old
******” I guess but I am very attracted to cis-women who have the
typical nurturing qualities, as well as a soft voice (not loud and
brassy), walk with a feminine gait, show emotional and physical
warmth, and smile a lot. Oh and love animals too! I want to emulate
these traits when I crossdress but I don't really know if I pull it
off. Chuckle.

What about
showing emotion? As crossdressers getting all watery eyed will only
spoil our makeup job, especially your eyeliner. Plus we'll have
mascara running down our cheeks. That's not good. But it doesn't hurt
to show emotion. And it is certainly much more typical of women than
men but I have seen more than one crossdresser cry real tears over
things important to them.

Men are
wonderful creatures. We do not want to see them become just like
women. (I love watching men's and women's pro ice hockey but the guys
play a much more powerful, faster and exciting game.) Men are due
respect just as women are and these days that seems sadly lacking all
too often. We need to change this.